I have to say, that one post made me feel GOOD! Am i the only person who always promises to do it all and winds up doing nothing? I’m trying to change that. Regardless of whether this will be a success or not.
I was blaming society. Society begins right in our homes. Society does not allow us to be feminine. We are not allowed to embrace who we are and how great a gift that is. They have created names over time to discourage us.. they all rhyme with ‘slut’ and whore’.
I believe i am a feminist. But only if feminist simply means someone who believes in equal rights for all genders in all areas of life. Not if it means i have to be masculine in order to prove my point. I want to share the same rights and privileges as any guy in my class, where i work, in the bus, at church..whatever.. but i don’t want to have to be a guy to do that. Now i’m not saying that’s what all feminists advocate for, but going through some stuff on the internet, i get that vibe from some of them.
Beyonce, who i love with all my womanliness (LOL) has been constantly criticized by feminists. They simply don’t want a beautiful and sexual woman to be a feminist because that goes against what they are trying to preach to the world. And that is, women can and should be like men, not equal to..LIKE men . This goes in line with the idea that feminine traits are weak and frivolous etc thus agreeing with the societal view of women. In short, my dear manish uptight feminist..you have not done anything other than confirm man’s superiority.
“..woman simply equal to man would be like them and therefore not women..”
See your sexuality is a gift, and that gift gives you power. Our femininity is our sling (yes, in a David and Goliath kinda way). Use it right and you can rule the world. Even guys know this. Ask them? (crossed fingers they back me up :D) Recognize that your femininity is your strength and not a weakness. You are allowed to put on make up and look pretty. You are allowed to put on that ‘freakum’ dress and look sexy. You should be able to do this without being objectified. Femininity has been often misconstrued as being performed for the benefit of men. This invalidates the autonomy of such women, why can’t i look pretty for me? We should seek to empower femininity, not demean it.
You’ve all heard the expression ‘beauty with brains’ .. i have so many friends who are like that. Smart as hell, and still sexy like you don’t even know. We have the power of our minds and i am proud to see more and more women using this power everyday. But you also have the power of your being a woman, more women should be encouraged to use this as well. We have the power to seduce..to get what we want. power;of;seduction (check that out later, let me know if its clickable LOL) We are also sensitive. We are this world’s mothers..we carry on the generations. We have so many traits that make us great. That make us beautiful. Don’t be ashamed of that. Take Beyonce for example, she is a queen in a genre where women aren’t given the same treatment as men; she is a mother and wife and can still rock it in heels and be boss on stage..if that’s not feminism i don’t know what is. If that doesn’t give you a clue of the power you posses as a woman, i don’t know what will.
Boys can do a lot too. Don’t get me wrong. But i’m not talking about you today. And not everyone looks like Beyonce. I know that. I am nowhere close. But that is still beautiful. I hope you see my point in all this.
We have lived in a patriarchal society for the longest time. And until we recognize our authenticity as feminine, its always gonna remain like that. Femininity is about being free. Its an internal experience with your self; your clothes and make up or lack thereof reminds you of that experience. I read something about ideal femininity which apparently is the attributes and mannerisms that have been associated with females during the socialization process, women internalize these traits and are rewarded for “gender-appropriate” behaviour. Screw that! Ideal femininity is when a woman accepts and encourages being a woman in all forms. Define yourself. Whether you’re a lesbian and tomboy. That is YOUR femininity. Embrace every bit. No one can define a woman but the woman herself. Your authentic femininity has a flavor unique to you. It has to be yours damn it!
Femininity is also your openness. Men are not the enemy. A woman should be able to be completely open to men, able to be made happy and willing to be vulnerable, with the positive intention in her heart. Men are called to serve her. Her vulnerability can be her greatest power. That is also something i read. When you’re out being independent and empowering yourself in all ways, let him carry your bag, open the door for you, pull the chair out for you, go down on you etc.. Its not a competition.
What am i saying? Be smart. But be feminine too. Be you.
As i said.. quoting someone else by the way, ..”find a way to be a woman that roars but hasn’t lost her purr..”
As Marilyn Monroe said and i love this: “I don’t care if its a man’s world, as long as i get to be a woman in it”
Because in the end, who runs the world?